March 18, 2014

Home is where your heart is

I've been having a few days lately where I'm feeling sad, but I have a hard time calling it "homesick."  I think it's because of how I have come to define the word home.


Minnesota is where our friends & family are.  Sure, there are a few sprinkled around the country in other places, but most of them are in our home state.  I knew moving across the country would be hard.  Not because we miss the sub zero temperatures and huge mountains of snow, but because we miss the people.  

This is an amazing opportunity for us to get to live somewhere new for a while and explore, but we are missing out on a lot of things too.  We are missing birthdays, weddings, celebrations and random Saturday night gatherings.  Those don't stop when you leave.  They happen without you.  People have a good time when you aren't there.  Sometimes, that sucks.  There have been many moments in the last 5 months that I have shed a tear over a picture on Facebook or Instagram because those are my people having fun without me.

It might sound crazy or selfish to those of you that haven't experienced a move away from friends & family, but to me, it's very real.  

I went into this experience with little expectations about anything.  I didn't want to be anxious or too excited.  I wanted to just take each day at a time.  We have had mostly amazing days, but there have been a few that make me really miss Minnesota and family and our friends and I want to curl up in a ball and cry about it (and maybe I have.)

I'm so lucky that I'm going through all of this with my husband and from day one, we both agreed to talk it out when we're having those days so we can help each other through it.  

You always see the signs that say home is where your heart is and I truly believe that.  Part of my heart is back in Minnesota, but a big part of it is here.  

We love where we are living and the things we get to experience and luckily there are so many distractions.  We live across the river from the greatest city in the world.  We could explore a new place every day and never eat at the same restaurant twice.  We are meeting brand new people and starting to form relationships with other twenty/thirty somethings that left their hometowns to come and explore just like we did.  It's a crazy experience.


Please tell me that I'm not the only one that has those feelings and those days.  What do you do to get through it?  Does it get easier?

11 comments:

  1. I'm on the opposite end of things... my only sister moved away when she got married almost 6 years ago and I miss her and her family like crazy. So know that while you're sad to be missing bdays or holidays, they're missing you too! Even though it's tough on some days, you have to remember you guys made this choice for a reason and you'll absolutely cherish the memories you make in this 'season' of life. HUGS your way girl :)

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  2. Yep! To this entire thing-- it's SO hard somedays, even if you're 100% happy with where you're living now, when you leave family somewhere else I think there will always be a part of you that is missing or back with them. As much as it's not so much a place, but a part of who you are and how those people impact your life. I don't think it ever gets easier, I think you just get more used to it-- you learn to look forward to the times when you're able to get together and it definitely makes you appreciate time spent with those far away more than you ever realized. I feel like I'm just rambling now, but I hope you're feeling better soon :)

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  3. It's not permanent and one day you will find yourself missing your friends you have made in New York City! I am in the same boat as Erin LLF, my sister moved away from me quite a few years ago and it still makes me sad we are not together! Thank goodness for FaceTime!

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  4. I can TOTALLY relate to this. I live in SF, but my family and close friends are in LA. I am pretty much permanently homesick and often cry when I have to leave (cue embarrassed face). I think if you're close to your family it is normal to feel that way.

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  5. I moved from the Chicago area to Maine to live with my husband whose from Maine. Its hard on and off. Sometimes its wonderful and fun to be in Maine where there's no traffic and it takes forever for snow to start looking really dirty after a storm. And sometimes I miss my old friends and my family so much and all the things I used to do at home that I can't do here. Or the things here that I find terrifying get overwhelming like how dark it gets at night or having to drive up and down hills in the snow. It's been especially rough since my grandma and my dad are getting older and I can't spend time with them since I am so far away. But I get through the bad days and then I have good days again where I'm all excited about this new and interesting place. Making my own friends here and getting involved has helped a bit.

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  6. Uhm, when I moved out I only moved 20 mins away and I stilllll cried for MONTHS! hahahah You're not alone!

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  7. I've never moved away from home, but most of my family lives in Argentina. I have a few cousins whom I'm close to who are close to each other as well. I'll see pictures of them together having dinner or whatever and it makes me sad to be so far away and to never be able to take a part of it. Stay strong!

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  8. Of course you're not the only one who has these types of feelings, it's normal! You packed up your life and moved to a foreign place. That's scary, and I admire that you did it with as much grace and gusto that you have. Your time here will fly, and you'll be back to subzero temps, piles of snow, and all your family/friends before you know it! But until then, like you already have, embrace all this change and live it up!

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  9. I've always lived where I grew up, but I know my friends who have moved away always have acute stabs of near physical pain missing "home." You are not alone.

    You guys are embracing this so well and I know you'll look back on this fondly when you go back home.

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  10. I can definitely relate to this! I moved from Minnesota (!!) to California a few years ago, and it's hard to deal with the fact that life goes on without you. The distance does make the reunions even sweeter though!

    xo, Hima
    Hima Hearts

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  11. I think that is one of the toughest things about moving away: you learn their lives don't stop when you leave. I stay in touch as much as possible, but like you, I feel like I'm missing so much. I'm missing their lives and I can't be apart of those memories, and that sucks.

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Thanks for reading my ramblings. It makes my heart happy.