December 30, 2011

The War Rages On.

Day Two of the war on Hector happened on Wednesday.  We stopped at Target and purchased 3 different kinds of traps to catch him.  Justin laid all the traps out and we waited.  I quietly read my book and Justin watched a movie.  We went to bed with a lot of hope that the following day would bring the end.

Hector 6, Justin 0.

We woke up and all the peanut butter was gone, two traps were completely set off and there was no Hector in sight.  He somehow manuvered his way around 4 different traps while eating all the bait and not getting caught.  A few things could have happened... the most realistic option in our minds was that Hector could also open his wings and fly like another famous mouse.

We laughed the whole way to work as we contemplated our next moves.  We came up with nothing.  J called a firend of ours, Matt, who is an Animal Control Specialist and set an appointment for him to come help (calling in reinforcements) on Friday after work (that's today.)  Justin was feeling frustrated.  I couldn't help but sit back and laugh, especially when talking to some friends at work and they were sure that Hector was sitting on our couch eating movie theater candy and watching Star Wars while plotting his next attack.  Then, I received this picture via email... BEST EMAIL EVER.
I could tell he was steaming at his desk and I wasn't sure what to do.  I didn't want Hector to get him down.  It was like we were thinking the same thing at the same time, because I received this email from my loving husband.:

I didn’t tell you what I was thinking this morning after learning that Hector (silent H) had once again bested me.

I was so indignant when I saw that he had tripped two of the six traps and had suckled the peanut butter off of all of them that I actually became unbelievably clear in the head. My anger was a short lived thing and I started to laugh about it; it being the whole situation in general. I am being taken to the house by a tiny black mouse. I am a human. I am at the absolute top of the food chain, and I am being constantly lambasted by this four-legged critter that is usually killed by a cat. Something seems off. Then as I thought more about the situation it became clear to me that this is my life.

My life; a series…scratch that, an epic saga of failures and comical inadequacies that string from one incident to the next.

As I climbed the stairs this morning to tell you the news of Hector’s (again, silent H) victory, I realized that there is YOU. You, that chose to join me in this saga. You that help me get through this saga despite my failures. You, my lifelong teammate and best friend. Just you. Thank you for being there every day for me and for constantly challenging me and making me better. I relish in the moments of our victories and, because of you, can laugh at the mishaps. I love you and am so happy that no matter where our adventure goes – whether to Boston, Burlington, San Francisco or Europe – that you and I are an unbreakable team.

We will defeat this damn mouse. And we shall have victory. And we will have it, like everything, together.

I love you…AND YOUR FACE.

Hector 6, Justin 1.

So, I knew that we would be victorius.  We returned home and tiptoed downstairs.  So much suspense I could barely handle it.  We opened the laundry room door and Justin shreaked with excitement.  He caught a tiny little mouse in a trap.  There was so much excitement and yelling and cheering, our neighbors probably thought we won the lottery.  (I can't imagine the thoughts our neighbors have on us with the random acts of crazy that happen in our household on a weekly basis.)  As Justin was celebrating, I glanced over to the other side of the room where something caught my eye.  There he was, small and gray with a skinny, little tail, making his getaway up the copper piping into our insulation and ceiling (the great unknown.)  I could almost see him laughing and crying at the same time.  So, Hector lives on and we have now figured out that his fiance, Victoria, was sacrificed so he could continue his destruction of our house and our sanity. 

So, the battle continues.  Tonight, Justin will have Matt as backup.  We purchased rubber gloves so Victoria could be disposed of properly.  Hopefully Hector hasn't taken her to a final resting place somewhere in our house of his choice because I don't feel like tracking down a dead mouse.  Tonight, I'm hoping I can video tape some of the shananigans... I mean battle.  Wish us luck.

December 28, 2011

Waging War on Hector

Reason #1 why I love being married:

You're probably wondering if Hector is my husband, but it's not.  Hector is the mouse I discovered last night at about 7:30 PM when I went downstairs to swap out the laundry.  He was running around in circles confused by the light turning on.  I screamed loud enough for everyone on our side of the Mississippi to hear me and scared my own dog.  My husband was pretty sure that I had just encountered a murderer in our basement.  I may have overreacted just a little.  So with that scream heard throughout the neighborhood, the war began.  Two battles were fought last night.  The first involved J (my loving husband), Lola (my badass rat terrier - follow her on twitter if you're interested @lolafromstpaul) and Hector (the tiny little dark colored mouse).  J turned all the lights off and Lola sat on the stairs with him and his light saber and they waited until they saw movement.  I'm pretty sure Lola had no idea what was happening and was bored because she kept trying to sneak upstairs.  I was on the phone with my mom when I heard the light saber turn on (yep, it makes the same noise as in the Star Wars movies) and J yelled some obscene words at Hector and I was sure he had completed his mission.  Wrong. 

Hector 1, Justin 0. 

Our next move was to find some traps.  We made the 8 block drive to my mom's to pick up some glue traps they had and we baited them with shredded cheddar cheese and left them in our laundry room and in the theater room.  This morning, he went running downstairs to see if the traps captured Hector and won us the war.  Much to his surprise, the cheese was gone and Hector was no where to be found. 

Hector 2, Justin 0.

My husband has spent his day consumed with thoughts on battle number 3 and I believe we will be stopping at Menards on our way home to pick up some weapons.  He has been consulting some of the guys around the office.  The email he sent out was definitely necessary to share:

Subject: Unwelcome Intruder.
Last night we found out that we had an intruder in our home. I heard Steph scream and I was actually about a half-second from loading the Glock. Then, I realized that this unwelcomed intruder, the black bastard, was hiding under furniture. I tried to sniff him out and even released the hounds; they had no effect.

I set two traps for him last night only to find my traps still set this morning with the cheese missing. I could only imagine him sitting in a dark hole somewhere chuckling in victory. Tonight, things get real:

 My restored happiness

I will keep you all posted on this epic battle.  I can't even imagine where I would be without my husband.  I know my father would not come over and help me out with something so silly.  Wish me luck as I support my husband as he attempts to take down Hector. 

Also, for all you mouse supporters, we are not trying to harm Hector if we don't have to. We are purchasing "huts" that will trap him and we'll release him outside.